And, after much delay, the Captain weighs in on this season's monstrous competitors. Just in time for the next round.
I never claimed I was quick. It's a consequence of living a life on island time. I just wish I had an actual island on which to live on island time.
Valemask
Fey are a favorite of mine, and I want to like this creature... There's a lot dedicated to its net, but it doesn't seem like something a small fey with a longbow is ever really going to use. It's evoking this whole 'big game hunter in a tiny body' thing--which I love--but it just doesn't seem to quite line up. There's some talk of the game they play in the description, but then it talks about the darkmoon vale, and how they're too lazy to really hunt things so they just transform stuff into easier prey... except that they're still being transformed into "fearsome Medium animals"? And then there's the whole plant-trap thing, which seems like a cool idea tacked on at the end... maybe if the plants functioned as a net, and these things actually had a reason to use the net?
Kravyad
Flaming death bears. And they're hungry. This one is an instant favorite. It's got all the right bits for an evocative and memorable fight. The abilities all work together and play towards the whole 'I'm really hungry and also on fire' theme that it has. Swallow whole dealing fire damage, some immolation aura (and who doesn't love immolation auras?!), and flames that try to eat you. The howl is a little funky in its execution, but I'm still digging it. My only other complaint is they seem like they might veer too close to to Plane of Fire outsiders--they even speak Ingan! But that's a minor quibble. Just keep these things away from my ship. Like miles away.
Tatterghoul
The name nearly threw me on this one. Ghouls are overdone, and I'm not a huge fan of them to begin with. The flavor text is also not particularly exciting. But when you get down to the description, I'm so on board. They walk the line of daemon and undead, blending the aspect of death with the vengeful dead. They're the creepy creatures you spot out of the corner of your eye, where you're never really sure if you've seen something at all... It's great fuel for encounters. Its abilities are thematic, but I'm not sure I love them as much as the creature itself. Isolate fits, but... meh. And its super-blur is also fitting, but... meh. I feel like these could be executed better, though I'm not exactly sure how.
Hollow One
The name and feel of this one strike me more as undead than outsider, but I'm alright with creepy nature demons. Creepy organ-collecting is also pretty cool. I don't really get the whole synergy behind the name and function and the demonic corruption, but it all adds up to a really memorable encounter. Trying to save your buddy from having his heart ripped out? That's the stuff of legend. Aside from its creepy-factor, I'm not sure there's a whole lot going for this thing. The lore isn't particularly interesting to me, its description isn't super interesting and could just be some random fey thing, and its array of spell-likes just puts it up with all of the other 'stalk you in the forest' types.
Corpsebound
I might be biased towards the lore on this one because I read Lord of Runes not that long ago (spoiler: Zutha's lore plays a role), but there's something very satisfying about creature that crawl into stuff and use the body against you. The corpsebound does it pretty damn well, and I think the defenses granted by the body represent a body-shell pretty well. Consuming spells is pretty nasty, and I'm not entirely sold on the synergy with binding corpses, but it really makes one of these things scary to deal with. My players have universally terrible luck getting past SR, so I'm not sure they'd ever hurt these things.
Phase Mongrel
Also known as the Jumm-Vubburath. Bleh. I am not a fan of Lovecraftian names, no matter how popular they may be or how horrible the creatures of the deep may be. The name throws me off no matter what, though, since this is some kind of phase-spider-plant-thing. It's got some weird blinky powers to get in and out and pull people with it, but I feel like this has already been done? But it's also got the whole annoying fungus-spore thing, coupled with the equally annoying fungal-infestation thing. Add in a disease that functions more like a poison, and I'm not really sure where this thing is going. I don't think it's treading interesting new territory, as there's already plenty of invasive body snatchers that I don't want anywhere near me.
Malkin
More fey, and this time it's a creepy death cat. For its CR, it sure seems like a very noncombat creature. These strike me more as plot devices than creatures the players would outwardly face--which is totally fine, in my book. I can already imagine a village dying of a horrible sleeping sickness... except that plague is really just one fey cat being a complete dick. The problem is that when you actually come face to face with this thing you either completely trounce it or it manages to subdue you before proceeding to obliterate you with sneak attack and Con damage. Kind of boring for an encounter, but super memorable for its function.
Tranquility Ooze
I think this is a really cool niche for an ooze. Rather than munching on flesh and decomposing everything to the bone... it eats brains! Probably. I'm not so sure its mechanics match up with this, most notably because it's completely mindless and has no wisdom or charisma of its own to speak of. I guess it could have some instinctual hunger for emotions, but then why is it affected by them? With the reference to Jalmeray in the lore, it really seems like this thing wants to be psionic without actually being psionic... I have a long standing hatred for psionics, but I still love the concept of this thing. Then again, that Cha drain. Goddamn. I want to like this, but it just seems to fall short in execution.
Sorrow Stitcher
First off, that's a damn good name. I love the idea behind this thing, stealing emotions to sew into its own existence. I don't really buy into the whole separate shadow thing, and that feels like something better suited for a different creature with a whole dual-self thing. That said, its other abilities definitely tie into the theme. I feel like there's some mechanical and wording cleanup that could be done here, but there's definitely a solid creature here. As for how memorable it is, I can't really say. It has a lot of potential to be really cool, but I feel like 'really sad thing that wants to ruin your day' has been done a thousand times already.
Guillowed
Headless undead are also cool. They're a classic! The lore here is pretty awesome, and I find myself drawn to the extra tidbits of super-guilloweds. Mechanically, I think they're a little low on damage--except when they're not, and then you're dead. These, like the malkin, seem more interesting as noncombat and plot opponents. The actual fight might be cool, but it's one of those things you either win really hard or lose really hard, and those aren't the most memorable fights. They're also not particularly fun, as you just kind of get grappled into a coup de grace and then you're dead. And other than its guillotine power, it's not super interesting. Lots of other things have 'jk, I'm totally not a person' powers.
Thaumigorger
More cat things, but with scales this time. While it could be a case of parallel design, these remind me a lot of these things. They're not on the PRD and they're not really common (the only reason I know of them is because of The Wizard's Mask--which I liked, screw the haters), so it's understandable... but the fact that this is also (sort of) catlike doesn't really help the matter. At least they're different enough to stand on their own. I particularly like the inversion of its DR... vulnerability to mundane? That's crazy! The rest of it just synergizes really well with its theme. This thing does, in fact, eat magic.
Swarmwyrm
"Man, people really love swarms. I'll just make a swarm for my creature!"
Okay, this is cool take on how dragons could be a swarm. It's not a swarm of tiny dragons, but a swarm playing at being a dragon. And it does that pretty well. It's also suitably icky. It's also a pretty nasty combatant, as is befitting of a dragon. The only problem I've got with this is that it doesn't really feel like a normal dragon encounter. It's memorable, sure, but it's one of those types that sneaks into the dragon category without really being a dragon. I'm looking at you, drakes. Yes, you have draconic blood and all those neat immunities and things, but you're not in the same epic-encounter category as a real dragon. Also, swarms. Seriously, I'm tired of swarms.
Scrapshell Oyster
An swashbuckling oyster that collects awesome treasure inside of its shell instead of pearls. As a nautically-inclined fellow, this thing hits home. I... don't even know what to say. It's insane, but it's my kind of insane. The theme is solid, the abilities are on point with that theme, if sword-fighting a clam isn't memorable then I don't know what is, and damn if this thing isn't just downright cool. I'd totally get one for my crew (somehow), and this is the only creature I can say that for.
Matianak
More sad dead things. Apparently sadness is a theme for this season. These are pretty cool for the misguided aid aspect going on. They're just trying to help! In a way that might be moderately painful and extremely discomforting, but it's help. Its abilities are also really, really cool. Making divine things go haywire, while granting random things negative energy affinity? Neat! I'm a little concerned about how their damage would play out, though, since they are trying to help. Also, are they really neutral evil if they're legitimately trying to help in a really roundabout and debatably evil way? *insert paladin falling argument here* These do have a lot of fuel to be memorable encounters, so that's good. I can easily see them as incredibly annoying support creatures for a host of undead things or misguided 'healers' that are totally helping.
Despoiler
In my head I have this image of a Starcraft defiler. Damn similar names.
Fortunately, these are nothing alike. Because these are awesome. I love its use of a limited resource and how everything ties into its use of shards. I'm a little sad not to see the shards get tossed as negative energy javelins, but I can't have everything. (Admittedly, I just want to see one of these with class levels hurling black shards 20 miles to impale people.) The only thing I'm not really buying for this are its lore and name. So it forms from good-aligned clerics, because their bodies are good for storing bad-aligned energy. I'm also not really getting any despoiling from its actions... I mean, yeah it's got a desecrate aura and a super-altar it can lay down, but meh. I feel like its shards are a much cooler thing to go with for name and purpose.
And so that's it for this round of monsters! Sadly with only 15 of them, thanks to the possibly-legendary DQs of Season 9.
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